he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
