if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
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