Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
