i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
