she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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