is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
