He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
