RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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