we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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