I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
