I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
