Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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