she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Randomize
