Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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