You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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