I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
