Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
