DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
