I must be too annoying 4 u.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
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