He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize