HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
