More tranny stories later!
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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