I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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