This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize
