i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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