the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
