Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
we're making bets on your personal life
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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