Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
you will always have a special place in my vag
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
