You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
