that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
