I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
