you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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