on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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