Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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