How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize