On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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