No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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