Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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