I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize