I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
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