How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
