just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
