in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
