So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
