there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
