id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
