naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
