i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Small penises have feelings too.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
