Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize