The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
