Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
