she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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